The Early Years: Survival and Self-Protection

My childhood was marked by harm, neglect, and a lack of belonging. In response, I subconsciously constructed the first version of myself—a personality built around survival. I internalized beliefs that I wasn’t worthy of love unless I performed for it, that I didn’t belong anywhere, that I was only viable if I made myself useful or likable.

Throughout my childhood and early 20s, I was diagnosed by professionals with ADHD, depression, and borderline personality disorder. I was often labeled disruptive, angry, bi-polar, or just crazy. And while I didn’t know where the pain came from, I always heard a quiet voice deep inside that told me none of those labels were the end of my story.

The Voice Within

Even at my lowest, including moments of suicidal ideation, that voice never left. It came with visions—flashes of purpose, ideas to create community spaces, service-based businesses, or ways for people to thrive together. I remember, as a teenager, wanting to organize a fundraiser for a young boy with cancer. I made banners and reached out to his family, but soon felt overwhelmed and burned out. I never followed through. That pattern repeated for years.

I loved babysitting, Girl Scouts, and team sports—anywhere people connected through purpose. But I rarely felt like I belonged or that my ideas would be good enough. So I kept my dreams hidden, buried under shame and fear of rejection.

Looking back, it makes sense. My blood-family didn’t have the tools to help me feel lovable, seen, or safe. From before I was born, I absorbed the belief that I wasn’t enough just as I was. And from there, I developed behavioral patterns to cope.

A belief is just a cluster of practiced thoughts. And when we identify with our thoughts, we take actions that reinforce those beliefs. This creates neural pathways that become automatic habits. We don’t even notice it—until we choose to.

From Pattern Analysis to Conscious Creation

For years, I tried to fix myself. Therapy, self-help books, endless introspection—I was trying to earn worthiness, viability, and love. And while I had a sharp ability to spot patterns in myself and others, I had no structure to direct that awareness toward true creation.

My focus was on solving problems and avoiding discomfort, not on living by my values or building what I actually wanted. The result? Abandoned projects. Unfulfilling relationships. Cycles of burnout and crash. Symptoms labeled as "mental illness."

Meeting My Teacher

Everything shifted when I met Marc DiFrancia, a teacher whose framework for understanding the self helped me step into my power. His teachings form the foundation for much of what I now practice and share.

Marc helped me name what I had only vaguely felt: that the voice inside me was my higher-self—a real, grounded part of my life force, not some lofty spiritual ideal. Before Marc, I had been cultivating my ego and survival-self. After, I began listening to the subtle somatic cues and visions of my higher-self: my soul, my heart, the original self underneath the noise.

Higher-Self vs. Survival-Self

Marc's view of higher-self isn’t the romanticized version you see in spiritual media. It’s not about fantasy or escapism. It’s about the part of you that is oriented to truth, alignment, and real-time integrity. It’s another expression of your life force, asking to be heard, valued, and lived.

In our society, we’re not taught to discern between our original self and our conditioned programming. But the more we choose to listen to our higher-self—and act from it—the more it becomes the dominant force in our decision-making.

Where I Am Today

Today, I engage with life through the lens of my higher-self. I work daily to notice when my survival-self wants to run the show, and I choose differently. That choice changes everything.

It brings clarity to what I value. It orients my actions. It informs how I build, relate, and live. It gives me a stable, self-referenced internal compass.

And because of this path, my inner and outer life are more true, balanced, and fulfilling than they’ve ever been. You would never know I was once diagnosed with mental illness. And that says more about our systems than it does about me.

Why I Built This

Everything you see on this website—The Village, Self-Help Berlin, my coaching offers—is what I’m creating from this place. And it’s evolving. So am I.

You are warmly invited to walk your own path of personal freedom alongside me.

I’d love to support you within the structures I’m building.

Go ahead and reach out, join a space, or sign up for something that calls you.

I look forward to serving you in building your life—for real.

Love, Taylor

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